Its Love

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In my path set by You within this life experience, there is one presence that I have come to know and yet, for many years have I looked it in its eyes/essence and have quickly internally looked away in frustration and therefore fear because I felt that it was the very cause of my pain. I felt that it was the reason of why I suffered so much. I felt that it only hurt me instead of healing me, helping me, placing me in the path of the actions of the wicked who were out to destroy the soundness of my heart and mind. I have blamed it for a long time and felt that it only caused me to be weak to the harm that came to me; and it could only place me upon the path of more hurt, anguish, betrayal and the time that it takes of always spending so many years healing, instead of truly living.

I have been told by my Great-grandmother's beautiful spirit, “You have a beauty inside of you that you must protect, because if you come into contact with the wrong people in this life, that beauty could be destroyed by them through you.” She says, “Never allow the world to get the best of you, to the degree that you are only left with the worst of you.”

Her words have for a long time bared witness of those who are felt and thought to be close to my heart, but have only been close to it, for the sake of only piercing it to bleed and for the beauty within that she spoke of, would in time be punctured with a violent emotional and psychological trauma causing me to bleed unto a death within and cause within me a man who is of the walking dead, in whom bleeds, in never healing and will only cause others to bleed. For, the UN-healed cannot help to heal the world and its pains. But You placed something inside of me that has been a consistent healing reality:) And it is “Love:)”

Yes, it is love:) I have seen this in all of my states watching me as well as carrying me through my sorrows. When I wanted to go into isolation of the world through my pain of betrayal and betrayal's pain, speaking a convincing intelligence inside of me, in order to justify that isolation, but, it has forever been “Love” in its manner of not even having to speak a convincing intellect to me to feel otherwise, I have seen and understood that just its/love's presence is divine healing and clarity in one moment:) Its Love:)

It has only been love which has been my good minister and friend. When my loved ones turn against me for no reason, speak and write ill of me, by love being present it is love that protects me from acting out what my irrational emotions tell me to do. It is love of The Essene of The Creator in which keeps me sound and safe. Even though I may feel angry that they won't stop in their evil, love is still present to govern me, to protect me and to keep that beauty inside of me from being penetrated and destroyed by those who choose to be wicked, cold and callus. Its Love.

When I am decided with wisdom to move forwards and into the newness of this life journey, this profound movement and action is deeded as me being an unforgiving man, a cold and resentful man. It is a man who has love inside to move forwards and into his life purpose. A man who knows that his life purpose is not to bathe in conflict, misery and confusion in spite of who he leaves behind to willingly dwell in it. Yes, what is trying to contaminate him is wisely let go and left to die in their own misery, because he is not interested in being the cause of anyone’s death in any manner because he has a desire and a need for his hands to be clean. He is only placed here to offer his gifted heart and mind for the restoration of humanity.

He has become only interested in his purpose upon this earth as sacred as he is becoming to understand and to realize; and he understands that in spite of what he gains in this world commonly, his purpose will forever be above all of those superficial things in which they consistently demand within the current of this life. He has been enlightened to understand the principle of dedication and real love in not being directed in any particular direction but it is instinctively abroad and inside of every man and woman’s heart and mind.

It has always been love looking after my heart and mind. After the anger is made settled because the love and beauty within has caused it to leave, then I am only left with that which is of sound purpose and not something that has been made useless; and that is the beauty within the mind and spirit carrying a universal wisdom for all of humanity and not just a fragment of it produced by a divisive world order. It has forever been love that has kept me sane, sound and free from destruction. It is love....Its only love:)

David Anthony Brayboy

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